when reality has come to a point in which

 you have to get yourself into the state loony bin for social comfort...amongst who you ask, state loony bin vegetables people so fucked on psych meds with nothing to say but in reality my need for company is nothing but scientifiic basis, them as characters were better off not existing so i can sit and read all day in peace i forgot about women and about 8 months i never even masterbated i did nothing but read ...within that crowd. now sure for a gentleman like me that's an obvious but let me tell you as a non- exploiter of easiest comfort means, it is rather odd youd find place comfort there. i was a mid 20s drug user who needed nooone and i found peace around long-term confined loonies so ofcourse anton chekhov's the bet short story. now on to youthful romance i once knew a girl who had no breasts at all and boy what she did for me, in romantic hopes chatted with me endlessly on the other hand she was just a hobby to me. in that sense im a narcissist and i never thought once at that time that i should feel guilt of anything so my place and position in life today for me to dare mention a ladies name publicly once is radical. that was the eckstein character. now on to jew #2, i mean shit what kind of hick trash she take me for she thought she buy me a bag of dope in exchange for love life. i mean her last name might have played influence but my degeneracy had such elevated self-view that i was above the casual sex encounter. and i guess ppl knew what pops did to me in the jewish community and to think my name rung a brll to a point where on live russian tv they had em call ukrainian nazis BUT AS ALWAYS MY FATHER SAT BACK AND PUT ON THE I DONT HAVE AN INFLUENCE IN UR LIFE ACT. come on pops, ur homo sub-cultures paint me as god as they want . SORRY I WASNT BORN TO SERVE.  and now  i read a jewish title book which mentions the name jessica my new transgender in black buddy but to think ive stooped to this and people should hand me credits on anonymous sketch. i mean shit if u saw my first grade year book photo ud end your life by now to be in peace in heaven. sometimes its just that flawless freak of a child image that my mother holds on to so dearly and she dont love me at all anymore. and thatd be a shame. but what can i do mother dear IVE BEEN AFFORDEDLY PUSHED INTO THE LIFE OF A RUSSIAN ROMANTIC which required plenty of subtance abuse but however the fuck u wana spin it, i forget where i put somethin within cpl minutes and i cant talk so i aint a philosophy major but im raging in pager so for u catnippers who prolonged my chatting madness leader of whom being feline, showin up in rykers yo my man whatever ur homos look at it as is fine by me. nothing above small talk to my book except that one freak of nature who showed up in psychward for me in staten island just know that i love u so if u want to kill me its on you. so for you other irc characters, self-important assholes i could feel moment of sincerity in the freaky guy when he offered me to move to california in exchange for suckin some dick. but my man let me explain to u, ill suck dick to be laughed at sure, thats no problem im always with richard pryor in soul but to let anyone get emotionally involved with me. nah, i dont care where u afford to move me to.  I WAS BORN WITH A CONCIOUS AND MY "SOCIAL DECISIONS" RELIED SOLELY ON THE CONCIOUS DESPITE DRUG HABIT. SO YEH U YALE LAW PHILOSOPHERS GO N NIP N TUCK URSELVES ELSEWHERE. CUZ IM THAT MAN ABOVE. AND MY CRIME? PFFT PROVOKED BY INTERNET ANONYMITY WHICH WAS INSTILLED BY MY HOMO FAN CLUB LETS GET SERIOUS. AND NOW WHERE IAM TODAY? this whole sick shit, fuck outa here. sick is soft, i dont roll that one. film dont sync. and however ...ah whatever. im done. unbelievable. and for u sloppy arab bastard ponchik i hope u saw humor in it too. ur too dumb for alll else anyhow. good night. and im sorry if my brother dont god the brush to paint me as ...oh god i dont know how bro ASSOCIates with his homo pals. if i was into homo pals i wouldve chosen their fag hags anyway. but the ukrainian god with a vagina i managed to drug myself into believing she could be into such a freaky lookin boy of a jew :_* sacrifice for what sacrifice being who or do i need to write a dessertation for "yale law" cosmology distinct philosophy resynced