val kilmer even if further cards they deal me valya will kill me. Irony further. I remember only 2 women i ever gave flowers to in my life , my mother many times. And valya, once. All I ever did is say sorry, I've lived The Bet romantic short story. Romantic not in the sense of romance. More in the russian sense of definition. The hungry betting just my art. Once again "The Bet" - Anton chekhov. Short story, VERY SHORT. You must read. Whether you like jada or pac, em or even jay z stuck with uncle sam. Or whoever. That short story, will have you re-think rap. Believe that one. Now as far as my preference, all I got left as straight..is seeing alexis yestrday. Whatever or whoever she may be or whatever the fuck, dont matter. She's all I got as further claiming straight. Otherwise god I be taming at the heavenly gate. Only one man in russia whos allowed fame while being gay. Cause he was born in prison. American beauty....me a straight freak of nature. And that video of youthful me...which makes me a Mutt fruity take on beauty. But, you know..my father's "take on money" and whatnot, what all been done of me. BUT SERIOUSLY NOW...IF NOT FOR A YOUTHFUL COMA AT 22...RUINED MY BRAIN. BUT EVEN WITH A BRILLIANT MIND......I WOULDVE TURNED TO HOMO. Ironically enough, after that incident happened all that supported me as straight...was...were...homosexuals. Shit, more fucking irony on my life. Who I was born to be, what I was born to be, who I was born as me, just what birth created as me, cursed born god made me, further take on me, my life today...what's at stake just me. Anyhow...all this blog posting shit...all this rap..half of which me other hypnotized into me..whatever man. Sorry to gays...but I'm straight. I ain't no fucking narcissist. That leaves me with italian alexis. SAD AND AS SAD AS I MAY BE ON THAT ONE...I was aroused fooling around with one guy..when I was one and twenty, but I explained what lead me onto that. So now maybe, culture mixed or whatever fuck you call it. Alexis might be All lexus while I'm all text is. Whatever spin you vomit on that one. I mean me gay....that's turning 2pac 2 pasha as cri to 2 pauly a crumb. And like my brighton beach legend... "Peta mike" ...Queer mike never asked nobody for a penny always stood around in a russian neighborhood SHOWERLESS ETC....whatever he made of himself. We'd invite him to park to smoke marijuana and as figured into...he'd sit around quietly then go back to standing right at same spot we picked him up from me. Makes me wonder if the government has really went THAT FAR...with putting on undercovers of sorts in society. This "nigga" was a...phew. wild dude. okie